Wow... with everyone going back to school and each and every person in my life going a million zillion miles an hour... just wow... that I have time to sit, and think, and enjoy what is left of this summer...
I say I have mixed emotions about this weekend. I say "mixed" because I don't know what other words describe it. I say this in the hopes of something pops out of the screen and hits me like a freight train... I know My God is big enough for this weekend! If I know that, then why should I have mixed emotions about this weekend???? My Savior, My GOD, MY REDEEMER, MY BEST FRIEND, MY ONE AND ONLY WAY OF SALVATION! CHRIST JESUS!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
This weekend is going to rock everyone's socks off! We've built it up and up and all we can do is pray that God takes over this weekend, that He just simply shows off like only He can...
Dear God,
I just want to thank you. Thank you for loving me... thank you for dying for me! Thank you for loving me enough to send your son for me... I could never be more in debt for the price that was paid just for me to be saved... Jesus, you are my best friend, I pray that this weekend, I can show you off .... I want to be able to lift you up like I have never done before... This weekend is different than Ignite... I was hesitant, I was holding back, I was the road block and yet, YOU still moved, You moved me, the kids, the leaders, everyone involved, God, you are truly amazing and wonderful and awestruck and Jehovah... my Jesus, you... you love me... that love that no one else can take away from me, that hope that is within me, no one can take that away from me, there is something about the way I'm thinking, the way I'm praying God that You are setting something up... you are preparing a way for me this weekend... God I feel your presence, I know you are with me... my mixed emotions are gone... I'm full force, ready for this weekend... all because of YOU, all because you are my force, my refuge, my redeemer, my Christ... I love you Jesus, I trust you...
In your precious, sweet, love-filled name,
Amen
I just pray that you open my heart this weekend,
Showing posts with label awesome savior. Show all posts
Showing posts with label awesome savior. Show all posts
Friday, August 28, 2009
Sunday, August 9, 2009
Holy Flippin Cow!
It has been a month since my last blog!???!?!?!?!!
WOW So much has gone on, so little time! Who am I kidding, I have another month before school starts back :)
God has really worn me out... He is wearing me down so much that all I can do is look to Him... I try and I try and I try again and again. I get no where. I go to anybody and everybody, anyone that has two ears to hear, I try to get their help... I don't want to accept the fact that they can't help me... I'm dying... not a physical death, (not that I know of anyway) My spirit... I am so worn out from life, just thinking about this situation, or that situation, or what is going to happen if I do this, or date her, or hang out with them, or party here, or work there... there are soooo many options and soooo many doors and traps in life that I can't handle them all...
A good way to handle this way of thinking::
1.) Deep breath.
2.) Relax. God is in control.
3.) Duh! Jesus!??!? He is flippin sweet!
4.) Fall in love with Jesus and you're good to go...
5.) Jesus takes care of everything after step 4...
I know there are tons and tons of scripture that point to what to do in situations where you are feeling disappointed, or down... for instance, 2 Chronicles 20:15-- Do not be afraid or disappointed, for the battle is not yours, but God's. or what about Jerimiah 29:11 -- for I know the plans I have for you declares the Lord, plans to prosper and not to harm, a hope and a future.
These are great... but the verse that sticks out in my head right now is the one that I have written on a rubber band around my wrist... Luke 14:27-- Anyone who does not carry his cross and follow me cannot be my disciple...
What cross do I have to bear? Sin? I love sin, I'm human, we all do, honestly, the conviction of that love for sin, that's a big cross, a very deep thought, so it's not that bad unless you really think about it... my cross is that daily fight to do what I know is right... the thing that my Savior would say 'well done, my good and faithful servant!" I fail miserable at that, every single day... but by the grace of God, I am forgiven of my short comings and He embraces me with His love... I want to be His disciple, I want to be His child, I want Jesus to be my BFF I want to fall so in love with Jesus that this world can't even think about touching me...
What will it cost me? what will this devotion to Jesus cost? Will it cost me my friends, family, job, education??? What am I willing to give for the cause of the cross? what am I willing to do??? Jesus DIED for me, and what do I do? How can I NOT want to be like Him, serve Him, love Him???
Dear God,
I pray tonight that you open my heart, open my heart to Your will. Open my eyes to the doors before me. Open the doors you want open. Move me, Lord, move me!!! I feel as if a mountain is in the way, and I am stuck in the valley. I know you are with me, and will never forsake me, so I do not fear. I pray that you blow me away with the view at the top of this valley. This valley has many holes and traps, and many "quick routes" to the top. God, you are my only way, You are the reason I want to reach the top. I want to go where you lead me. Lord, lead me... mold me... I pray tonight that You continue to pore Your grace and mercy upon me, that You continue to lead me through this valley, this narrow road through the valley. I pray that I fall more and more in love with my savior, I pray that no matter what this world throws at me, that I do not veer off the track laid before me. I pray dear Jesus that you take me by the hand and show me the way to go.
In your Name, Amen.
WOW So much has gone on, so little time! Who am I kidding, I have another month before school starts back :)
God has really worn me out... He is wearing me down so much that all I can do is look to Him... I try and I try and I try again and again. I get no where. I go to anybody and everybody, anyone that has two ears to hear, I try to get their help... I don't want to accept the fact that they can't help me... I'm dying... not a physical death, (not that I know of anyway) My spirit... I am so worn out from life, just thinking about this situation, or that situation, or what is going to happen if I do this, or date her, or hang out with them, or party here, or work there... there are soooo many options and soooo many doors and traps in life that I can't handle them all...
A good way to handle this way of thinking::
1.) Deep breath.
2.) Relax. God is in control.
3.) Duh! Jesus!??!? He is flippin sweet!
4.) Fall in love with Jesus and you're good to go...
5.) Jesus takes care of everything after step 4...
I know there are tons and tons of scripture that point to what to do in situations where you are feeling disappointed, or down... for instance, 2 Chronicles 20:15-- Do not be afraid or disappointed, for the battle is not yours, but God's. or what about Jerimiah 29:11 -- for I know the plans I have for you declares the Lord, plans to prosper and not to harm, a hope and a future.
These are great... but the verse that sticks out in my head right now is the one that I have written on a rubber band around my wrist... Luke 14:27-- Anyone who does not carry his cross and follow me cannot be my disciple...
What cross do I have to bear? Sin? I love sin, I'm human, we all do, honestly, the conviction of that love for sin, that's a big cross, a very deep thought, so it's not that bad unless you really think about it... my cross is that daily fight to do what I know is right... the thing that my Savior would say 'well done, my good and faithful servant!" I fail miserable at that, every single day... but by the grace of God, I am forgiven of my short comings and He embraces me with His love... I want to be His disciple, I want to be His child, I want Jesus to be my BFF I want to fall so in love with Jesus that this world can't even think about touching me...
What will it cost me? what will this devotion to Jesus cost? Will it cost me my friends, family, job, education??? What am I willing to give for the cause of the cross? what am I willing to do??? Jesus DIED for me, and what do I do? How can I NOT want to be like Him, serve Him, love Him???
Dear God,
I pray tonight that you open my heart, open my heart to Your will. Open my eyes to the doors before me. Open the doors you want open. Move me, Lord, move me!!! I feel as if a mountain is in the way, and I am stuck in the valley. I know you are with me, and will never forsake me, so I do not fear. I pray that you blow me away with the view at the top of this valley. This valley has many holes and traps, and many "quick routes" to the top. God, you are my only way, You are the reason I want to reach the top. I want to go where you lead me. Lord, lead me... mold me... I pray tonight that You continue to pore Your grace and mercy upon me, that You continue to lead me through this valley, this narrow road through the valley. I pray that I fall more and more in love with my savior, I pray that no matter what this world throws at me, that I do not veer off the track laid before me. I pray dear Jesus that you take me by the hand and show me the way to go.
In your Name, Amen.
Sunday, June 21, 2009
Just another Sunday... Hold my heart
Happy Father's Day first off... a great day to be a DAD! (not that I am one or anything...)
But just to type about nonsense this morning...
asd;lkfhas;ldjfhbawuioehajklsdlgakjsdbgvlkashdglkjasdoiu
awehfljasdnvlkjzcxbnlvkjzsbhd
lgvuashdgluahsgliuawheg
Just kidding, the real reason for blogging. There's a lot going on in my life that I have no control over. So much, that I try to grab everything and run like a wild fire. I'm tired of running... I'm tired of holding on... I'm tired of trying to control my life... I'm tired of the mediocrity of my life...
I've had a radio/clock in my room, next to my bed, for who knows how long... and this morning, I decided to turn on the radio while I was getting ready for Sunday School. God just loves to show off I believe because after a long long long night of a heavy heart, God let me listen to this song by Tenth Avenue North entitled " Hold My Heart"... I would put the entire song on here, but I'll just put the chorus and a verse:
**************************************************************
So many questions without answers, Your promises remain
I can't see but I'll take my chances to hear You call my name
To hear You call my name
One tear in the driving rain,
One voice in a sea of pain
Could the maker of the stars
Hear the sound of my breaking heart?
One life, that's all I am
Right now I can barely stand
If You're everything You say You are
Won't You come close and hold my heart.
Hold my heart, could you hold my heart?
Hold my heart.
****************************************************
And that is exactly what MY GOD did... He held my heart, He opened me up enough so He could come live in me and be glorified today... He helped me hold back the tears, hold off the bad attitude, hold off biting somebody's head, holding off the world... just so I could get back up on my feet one more time... My God is so good, that in the mist of all this turmoil and trouble and pain, He is there... holding my heart, He is picking up all the pieces, He is putting me back together for His purpose and not my own.
Dear God,
I just simply want to thank you! Thank you for saving me from this world. You say in 1 John that the things of this world will not last, but the things not of this world, will last forever. You last forever, I last forver in you Oh God! I pray that you take my heart into Your will. Do your will through me, whatever it takes. Whatever it takes.
~A
But just to type about nonsense this morning...
asd;lkfhas;ldjfhbawuioehajklsdlgakjsdbgvlkashdglkjasdoiu
awehfljasdnvlkjzcxbnlvkjzsbhd
lgvuashdgluahsgliuawheg
Just kidding, the real reason for blogging. There's a lot going on in my life that I have no control over. So much, that I try to grab everything and run like a wild fire. I'm tired of running... I'm tired of holding on... I'm tired of trying to control my life... I'm tired of the mediocrity of my life...
I've had a radio/clock in my room, next to my bed, for who knows how long... and this morning, I decided to turn on the radio while I was getting ready for Sunday School. God just loves to show off I believe because after a long long long night of a heavy heart, God let me listen to this song by Tenth Avenue North entitled " Hold My Heart"... I would put the entire song on here, but I'll just put the chorus and a verse:
**************************************************************
So many questions without answers, Your promises remain
I can't see but I'll take my chances to hear You call my name
To hear You call my name
One tear in the driving rain,
One voice in a sea of pain
Could the maker of the stars
Hear the sound of my breaking heart?
One life, that's all I am
Right now I can barely stand
If You're everything You say You are
Won't You come close and hold my heart.
Hold my heart, could you hold my heart?
Hold my heart.
****************************************************
And that is exactly what MY GOD did... He held my heart, He opened me up enough so He could come live in me and be glorified today... He helped me hold back the tears, hold off the bad attitude, hold off biting somebody's head, holding off the world... just so I could get back up on my feet one more time... My God is so good, that in the mist of all this turmoil and trouble and pain, He is there... holding my heart, He is picking up all the pieces, He is putting me back together for His purpose and not my own.
Dear God,
I just simply want to thank you! Thank you for saving me from this world. You say in 1 John that the things of this world will not last, but the things not of this world, will last forever. You last forever, I last forver in you Oh God! I pray that you take my heart into Your will. Do your will through me, whatever it takes. Whatever it takes.
~A
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